I want to get in on the act with all these picks. I think I have the most incite into these games, so I should do well.
Patriots vs Scorpions/Sting
Well, the Patriots have Tom Brady, and Randy Moss, and a cameraman...oh wait, wrong Patriots. When I think of Patriots, I think of Mel Gibson and his axes. He's pretty mean with them, and accurate. BUT, can he kill little bees and scorpions. I mean just a bunch of Bee's OR Scorpions is bad enough. Put them together!!! That's like a 1970's horror movie...it's like Snakes on a Plane. It's Scorpions and Bee's on a Patriot. I don't think the patriot can kill all of those lil' critters with his axe.
Patriots 3(squished with his foot)
Shamrock vs Blitz
What's up with all these teams not using plurals anymore? What ever happened to using only animals, and making it plural, instead of ONE singular thing??? I mean it's ONE plant...almost a weed. It's also only ONE blitz...who is blitzing? Is it a run blitz? What happens if you don't get a sack? You don't have anymore left. This would be more intruiging if it were the ShamrockS vs the BlitzES. So anyway...one poor plant is no match for a Blitzgreig of players.
Blitz 3(assuming they blitz 3 LB's)
Shamrock 1 (poor fella')
Cutters vs Chargers
Now these are some COOL names. I'm going to date myself now. The CUTTERS, when I think of that, I think of the movie Breaking Away from 1979 with Dennis Quade. Four guys living in Bloomington enter the Little 500, and beat all the fraternity boys. The CHARGERS...like a mean car. Just like the General Lee, but not orange...but baby blue or whatever shade of blue their ugly uniforms are. So it comes down to horsepower here. Can the blue General Lee with Earl driving beat four teenagers on bicycles??? I'm sorry Cutters, but I'm gonna give the edge to the Chargers...I think you'll have them until Earl jumps over a rock quary to beat you!
Vikings vs Wildcats
Now that the Vikings aren't throwin' up gang signs with the Warriors, they are ready to go. I don't know much about the Wildcats. They're not big cats, but they are WILD...they're nuts. They're the cat that would goto a bar, and start a fight with the biggest guy there...a guy who is really hairy, and wears a Flavor Flav helmet. Oh wait...that would be a VIKING. I think Vikings think they're a badass just because they're a Viking. I think they would under estimate this nutty little feline. I see the Wildcats sneaking up on the Vikings and breaking a bottle over their head, then pulling their shirt over their face and kicking them in the huevos(Spanish Majors????).
Cougars vs Warriors
I think these teams could spit on each other from their home fields. This is a close one. The Warriors will be travelling to Fort Recovery to play the game. I think Cougars are stealthy...sitting and waiting for the Warriors to come marching in. The Warriors used to have a great edge, but now with all the money from the Casinos, I think some complacency could set in. Plus the Cougars will be at FORT Recovery...it's a fort man!! That's awesome! So there's got to be cannons or a place to poor hot lead on the Warriors. That's definite advantage.
Crush vs Thunder
Another battle of the Singulars!! These are mean names though...CRUSH & THUNDER!! I'm gonna CRUSH you! I hear THUNDER! Well, actually thunder isn't really dangerous...it's scary, but the lightning is what does the damage. But a crush is dangerous...I don't know what A crush IS, but I don't want to meet it in a dark ally. I just think of them as a gang of REALLY fat guys in suits...they just gang up on you and sit. That would give them the advantage over a SOUND. BUT...if you saw the Thunder's old website, they had a bit of magic...Harry Potter font. I mean that's gotta give you somethin'...maybe a spell to cast over the gang of fatties to shrink them down a bit. This one's tough.
Thunder 6(all bark no bite...GO LIGHTNING!!)
Crush 6 inches(too small to do anything after the spell)"that's what she said"
Wranglers vs Mustangs
Now this is a match made in heaven. Bitter rivals...natural enemies!!! What do Wranglers do? They WRANGLE MUSTANGS! Now Wranglers could be jeans...you know, jeans that fit uncomfortably tight. They fit almost as bad as Rustlers!! My mom bought be a pair of Wranglers when I was a kid...I didn't grow up on a farm or a ranch, so there was no need. I would have been ridiculed and beaten for wearing them. Now, I would have loved to have a Mustang. My first girlfriends' mom had a '64 Mustang, and I got to drive it a few times. Point Horses...
Mustangs 69(think girlfriend)
Wranglers 0(number of times I wore them)
There you go guys!! It's all very simple!!
Now go get 'em!!