supaheader

General Forum
Start a New Topic 
Author
Comment
Daggumit

ENOUGH with the tear jerking stuff...what's the FUNNIEST line youve ever heard, TV commercial, Sitcom OR movie...

I STILL love the old Bud light " I love you man" but doesnt get the laughs like before..

But I love South Parks Mr.Garrison when Stan asks to be excused early from class, and he sarcastically remarks "What is it now, Stan..Another prostate exam?"

And That gum commercial "Who you callin a cootie queen, you lint licker!"

AND...my favorite from the Simpsons - Ralph Wiggum
"Hi Principle Skinner, Hi Supernintendo Chalmers!"

(superintendent...ahh, ya gotta watch the show...)


Hendricks

Re: Daggumit

haha well lets see:

movies:
the break up-
"What kind of bullshit move was that?" referring to himself getting punched in the throat

wedding crashers (oh wow here we go)-
"What are you doing? It's a game of touch football, every time I look over you're on your ass again!"

"YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH WHEN YOUR TALKING TO ME!"

"Janice, I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair."

"I almost numchucked you, you don't even realize!"

Blades of Glory-
"Get out of my face!" "ill get inside your face!"

Jimmy: I see you got fat.
Chazz: I see you still look like a fifteen year old girl, but not hot.

"Troubled childhood? If you consider a 9 year old kid with a 35 year old girlfriend troubled?"

"I am NEVER satisfied! It's a curse"

Jimmy: I call top.
Chazz: Sorry, I already called it in my head...
Jimmy: No, you can't do that, that doesn't count.
Chazz: Yes it does.

Blade Trinity:
Hannibal King: We call ourselves the Nightstalkers.
Blade: Sounds like a reject from a Saturday morning cartoon.
Hannibal King: Well, we were going to go with the Care Bears, but that was taken.

Semi-Pro-
"F*ck you clarence!" (as he is being attacked by a bear)

"You mother F*ckin c*ck Suckers!" (when the team tells will ferrell they didnt want him to coach the team anymore,lol) sorry for the language!

Waiting-

Ryan Reynolds- "Id do her, hell id even pay..(shaking head no laughing.. stops and looks serious ahead) I would"
SOO MANY MORE!

Re: Daggumit

Boston Legal has some good oneliners with William Shatner's character Denny Crane.

Schmitt: "Denny you can't have sex in your office with your girlfriend with your blinds open for everyone to see."

Denny Crane: "Ok I swear the blinds go down before anyone else does!"

Office Space

Bob: "So Peter we've noticed you've been missing alot of work lately."

Peter: "Well Bob I wouldn't exactly say I've been missing it."

American Pie Beta House

Right after the guys shoots himself in the mouth with the aged horse seemen playing greek roulette.

Mr. Levenstein: "Well son we all have these set backs but at times like this you have to get up and get right back up on that horse.......ahhhh metaphorically speaking"

American Pie Naked Mile

Mr. Stiffler: "We don't fake sick to pull d*ck. We cut class to get ass."

Eric Stiffer: "Yeah I know dad that saying is on our family crest."

Van Wilder

Van (played by Ryan Renolds): "Take you for instance I'm guessing you wear granny panties."

Gwen (played by Tara Reid): "Is that to imply that I'm uptight."

Van: "No, I just wanted the visual."