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Well its been a heck of a week over here for me. ups and downs like you wouldnt beleive. Wendsday had a great weight in. Then thursday I thought was going great. I was in a great mood work was going well till about 300 when they got to some parts I had made for the window earlier in the morning they were supposed to be primed not regular pine. cost the production line alot of time. Ended up getting a formal counciling which is like a talking too by your manager. But I dont handle people being disipointed in me very well About 2 months ago I was put on prozac for anxiety attacks and sesonal depression. This winter just got to me they said. Anyway I had started crying because I knew it was coming and by the time of the meeting I was crying and having an anxiety attack so bad I couldnt breath. Went home and was so mad at myself for what I did and having the attack I just ate. Pb bliss bars, and then way too much supper. Finally a nice warm bath and a neck rub from DH helped calm me down. I crashed early that night those attacks really wear me out. I think I got the attack because I was so mad that I am one week from my evaluation and I had a really good chance at a raise this year and I probley just blew it. Slept it all off talked to my manager the next day and explained to him why I acted the way I did because I couldnt even talk to him the day before I was crying so hard.

This is the first time in along time I went to food when I was mad. But I was tell ing my self all the way to the fridge I didnt need it but I didnt stop my self. Normally I am a boerd eater. WHen I get mad I usually clean!!!

So last week is over now and a new one begings lets hope it is better this week

Re: struggles


I am so sorry to hear about your rough week. I am sure this next week will be better. So what that you overate that day - the fact that you haven't done that in such a long time is the true testament of how far you have come. Anxiety and panic attacks are scary and it is sooooooo normal to just revert back to what comforts you. I have so been there. I have anxiety too and so does Wes. I tried medication and it had too many side effects for me, but Wes takes meds daily. They have been such a blessing to us. It literally makes him a new person. I am sure your manageer understood. You are human and no one expects you to be person. Give yourself a hug and know that we are here.


Re: struggles

Bless you, Chelsie. Life puts far too much pressure
on us to be perfect. Not that I have ever had perfec-
tion as my goal - far from it - but I certainly have
wasted a lot of time with worrying. :-( Try to concen-
trate on the knowledge that there are people who love
you just for who you are!! I will have you in my
thoughts and hope for you that this next work week
will not be as traumatic.


Re: struggles

THanks guys. It just feels so good to come here and talk to you all about it because other people dont understand how frustrating it can be to stay op when the ups and downs of life hit you.

bless you all

Re: struggles

Chelsie -

I can so relate with you. Today has been one big struggle for me. I'm pretty bummed about some things an that's putting it mildly. Today I just didn't really care about counting points I just wanted to numb myself with food. Not good and I'm probably going to pay for it on the scale some but I've come to far to give up. I'll just read some motivation stuff and start over tomorrow. No need to throw in the towel; it's one day not 100 days off program. So, here's to a good rest of the week.