hi everyone. i am needing help. i lost 80 lbs but have gained back half of it and i am miserable. none of the new clothes fit and i have had to buy new things 2 sizes bigger than i got into 6 months ago. i have the "want to" but not the drive or passion i had then. i know what i need to do, but i feel like i am rebelling against all the rules. self sabatoge. i know better than to buy the junk, but i do it and then i get disgusted and throw it out, but i do it again. i am starting all over and i have a friend who is starting with me- she does on-line. how did you guys find the motivation and the drive to start or start again and get past the self loathing and disappointment in yourself for messing up? please help me get back on track!!!!!!! andra

Hi Andra,
I'm kinda in the same spot you are. I'm still trying to find that motivation I once had, but haven't been able to find it yet. I've had a little while to think about this, and I think there really is no outside answer to really motivate. I think we just have to find the motivation from within ourselves to want to succeed. We're the only ones who can make ourselves do it everyday. I've even thought "Aimee you could have a heart attack or stroke" but that hasn't been enough to really motivate me. I know I want to lose the weight, and I know I can lose the weight. I just keep messing around though and not getting really serious about it. I know if I can just start exercising on a regular basis that it will help get me going again, but I haven't been able to make the time everyday. I wish I had some magic words for both of us that would motivate us, but I really don't. Even when I do feel motivated, it doesn't last very long. I think I'm going to have to do like the Nike commercials say... Just Do It!

i know what you mean. all the reasons i had before dont do it any more. health reasons-vanity-revenge(dont ask) none of them do it. i am thinking like you-just keep doing it anyway and dont quit. and somewher-somehow the motivation will return. i am going shopping after work and i plan on taking my slider with me-as always and just going aisle by aisle and check out new things to eat. i think that is part of it- i am bored with the same old things. i have been scanning your recipes and have gotten great ideas so i will be trying them too. thank you for creating this website which is an inspiration for so many of us. you should be very proud and i cant wait to get the bracelets i ordered-one for me and one for my best friend. andra

Hey Andra,
I just sent you an email about sparkpeople.com. I forgot to mention... your bracelets are being mailed out today (on my way to the post office now). :)

In fact, anyone reading this who ordered books or bracelets (before today), all orders are being mailed out today. You should have them next week. Thanks to everyone who patiently waited on the 2nd cookbook to come back into stock.

I hear you both on this one. I lost 75 pounds 5 years ago, had a significant tragedy in the family and have never been back on track the same way since. I've gained back as much as 25 pounds, and now I'm back to 60 lost. It's just today that we can concentrate on. If I do well today I can just be happy with that. If either of you find that motivation button.... press mine please! Until then, I'll just do what I've done.
1. accept that this lifestyle has to be forever. No cabbage soup diets, no meal substitutes.
2. accept backslides and move on without guilt.
3. keep crappy food OUT of my house.
4. ask for support constantly
5. avoid those who don't want this for me.
I'm sure you both have a great list too~!

This is what Dr. Phil says in his book Ultimate Weight Solution :
Many of you when faced with going on a diet or starting and exercise progam, tell yourself that you cannot tollerate the frustration and discomfort of not eating your favorite foods or having to haul you ample rear to the gym. Unable to stand the discomfort of changing you have a low frustration set, expressed in thinking that goes somethng like this,"It's too hard, Its easier to stay fat. I can't be bothered with exercise."
So to protect yourself, you convince yourself that any type of dietary or lifestyle change is just too difficult. This type of internal dialogue is marked by constant pessimism, and you upset yourself with these LIMITING THOUGHTS. One reason you persist in it is its payoff: you're avoiding frustration and discomfort, but in doing so, you've cluttering up your mind with all kinds of BS so every time you think about losng weight, you quit before you even get to the starting line.........(that was word for word.) hope it helps

motivation has to come from inside. you are right. i am feeling much more optimistic today because i stayed on points and got my water in too. i feel happier tonight and just more hopeful. i have gotten lots os support here and on my other site and i do appreciate all the input. and dr phil has some good advice. we sabatoge ourselves with all the negative talk and it is so much easier to just stay fat and miserable and blame it on circumstances. but anything worth doing is tough and we will all be stronger for it and will appreciate it all the more. and thank you aimee for the notice about the bracelets. every time i look at mine i will think about you and your success and that will be my motivation too. i can be very competitive at times and i will make that goal, thanks again for the jump start and the support. i know i can do it. andra

Hi Everyone,

I'm new to this site and I'm so glad that someone put it on the message board at WW. (THANKS)

Hang in there Andra trying to find the magic button to push to get started is rough. I think about it this way IF I DON'T QUIT I DON'T LOSE. I'm tired of letting myself down. So now I go day by day just for today I WILL MAKE IT.

Thanks Aimee for this great site and you keep up the great work.

Thanks Joy! :)

When I decided to join weight watchers again, I was so happy to find this site!!!I can relate to everything you all are saying. I was successful in weight watchers about 16 years ago, then got preganant, and of course, did not go back to pre=pregnancy weight. I went to WW a few times off and on throughout the years, but never stuck with it. I just returned 2 weeks ago, and so far have lost 7 pounds!!!)s] For some reason, I just finally feel like I am READY to do it. I am not sure why I feel differently this time, but I do. My sister and several friends are doing the program with me, and this is trememdous for support. My family is also very supportive, which is also a huge help. Keep up the good work everyone!

welcome to the group. this site is fantastic. the recipes are easy and affordable and aimee is really a motivation. by the way aimee i got the bracelet today and opened it right at the mailbox and put it on. will be taking the other one to my friend at work. thanks so much. will be scanning the recipes since i need to grocery shop in the next couple of days and am looking for new things to try.

Thanks Andra,
Glad you got them ok. :)